"Massager" looks suspiciously like Mickey Mouse's fist

So, I just got around to looking at this today, http://www.deepdiscount.com/Deep-Daily-Deal-_stcVVcatId492045VVviewcat.htm , and thank God I did because today's has to be the best thing that I have ever seen. Take a look at the picture that I have provided at the left if this deal is gone already because it is a must see. There are no number of scenarios where a vibrating Mickey Mouse fist could come into play. Is this a timid first attempt to get in on that Sanrio market for Hello Kitty adult toys? (www.j-list.com) by Disney? Oh, God, the awful things this could have lead to if it had worked out (given the 3.49 price tag it is an apparent failure). Ah well, I guess it can go on the shelf next to the classic vibrating Harry Potter toy broom.

Day of the Ninja and anniversary of the 21st amendment to the Constitution fall on the same day. Coincidence? I think not.

It was brought to my attention that both of these historic moments have today's date (thanks, Brooke). And I think I've now unraveled an important piece of history's mysteries: how Prohibition came undone. Clearly a mortal man could not have stood in the path of Americans with their panties in a bunch (A.W.T.P.I.a.B. tm). Who could face such a task? A pirate? Yes, but they were already making money hand over fist in smuggling rum so why should they? An astronaut? Astronauts are fictional and there is no such thing as the moon. No, clearly it was the work of a ninja or possibly a ninja clan. Ninjas always walk single file so that you can't tell how many were there by their tracks. Also, ninjas leave no tracks.

Someone, let's call him the Mighty Anti-Sobriety Ninja as his real name will never appear and probably be all Japanesey anyway, infiltrated the government, drafted an amendment to the Constitution of the United States and blackmailed or threatened all of the men who stood in the way of its ratification with pain of death or worse until they shut the fuck up and let everyone drink again. So, say a small prayer to the M.A.S.N. today as you sip from your beer can helmets, hoist your flagons of mead or, like me, drink mash liquor from the skulls of your enemies, in thanks. Then, say a longer prayer that he does not come for you in the night.

Renaissance Books at the Milwaukee International Airport

I went to Milwaukee to have Thanksgiving with Susie and Cindy again this year and had a great time as usual. We spent a lot of time with the new Wii (particularly Wii fit) and even more time eating to excess (hence the need for Wii fit). But on the way back I stopped be Renaissance Books at the Milwaukee International Airport. What a terrific bookstore to find in a huge place like that. How they stay in business is beyond me but they are superbly stocked. The variety and prices of these old books is impressive enough but the man that runs the place seems to do it alone. Given, I don't hang out there all day but I've never seen anyone else working there that I can recall. Dubious, I know, relying on my powers of recollection. Moving on.

I first noticed the place years ago when I first flew to into MKE. It looked like one of those old treasure trove bookshops you'd find in a strip mall or tucked into an alley somewhere. Dingy, dank and smelling of molding paper. Beautiful, in a word. The proprietors are inevitably gruff octogenarians, suspicious of your ability to care for tomes properly (as they should be; look at the state of yourself!). The old man at Renaissance isn't particularly gruff or suspicious but he has managed to transport his realm of mystery into the most soulless of places, the aeroport. But when I first encountered the place they had not made any of the renovations you'll see in the photo. The windows were boarded and there were stacks and stacks of books all over the floors. Sure, that's no big deal in a used bookshop but this is in an airport. They tend to frown upon disorder and dishevelment as a rule. That was what first drew me to it. How could this place possible exist? Who let this happend? "Hurry!" I thought to myself, "before they find out and close it forever," whover they in this case. But if they did find out about it they simply required the place to spruce up a bit and go about business as usual. Which was fairly brisk on Monday. I picked up a gift and a book about fortresses for myself. I needed it, you understand, for business reasons.

Should you find yourself in MKE for any reason take a moment to visit. The only other options are the PGA store and Brooks Brothers and if I'm giving you trip advice you're most likely not a douche in the first place so you won't be patronizing these establishments anyway.

Day 3 of NaNoWriMo

It is already day 3 of the writing contest and I have about 420 words down...out of the needed 50,000. This comes out to 1,6667 words per day on average. I am already short by 4,5680 words. Or I will be at the end of today if I don't do some serious catching up instead of working today. This is supposed to be the gravy time of the contest. Damn.

Eclipse restaurant in Sunset Park

Just had breakfast this morning(afternoon maybe) at Eclipse, this new Mexican spot I found. They have an interesting vegetarian menu (a rarity here; the vegetarian combo is particularly good), great food and are dirt cheap. Yasuko, the owner, is also quite nice. Today I had a cheddar/jalapeno/nopal (cactus) omelet that was delicious and enormous. Take a look.
Check this spot out if you are in the neighborhood. You won't regret it.
http://www.eclipsebrooklyn.com/

Nature's McGriddle

I stopped by the deli this morning to grab something quick and I had a hankering for egg and cheese on a roll. When I got outside and unwrapped it, though, I had that on a cinnamon raisin bagel. Sounds gross, I know. Guess the guy in front of me ordered it. I thought about taking it back but then I thought, "Fuck it. When would I ever actually order this abomination." So, I take one bite. It actually was kind of good. It was not unlike a McDonald's McGriddle, which is an awful idea but the greatest hangover food God ever turned His back on. Don't know that I would order it on purpose but as one of life's accidents I can chalk it as happy.

The current Frankencintricity of my life

I checked the mail on my way in just a few minutes ago and found, to my great pleasure, Frankenstein Unbound (which may or may not be good but irresistibly features Raul Julia as the doctor) from Netflix and my new shirt (shirt.woot.com), the American Gothic drawing replacing the farmer and his wife with the Monster of and Bride of Frankenstein. This was after a fifteen minute walk home from the train, upon which I had been reading- you guessed it- Frankenstein. Oh, and I signed up with the National Novel Writing Month again yesterday to write my newest opus, The Undead War, featuring Frankenstein's monster.
What is my obsession with Frankenstein anyway? I was never all that infatuated with the monster. Maybe it's the Halloween spirit manifesting itself in me lately but I doubt it. I previously had intended to write a novel featuring Dracula and Dr. Frankenstein as the principal characters and I've been toying with a screenplay for a couple of years that is basically a retelling of the Frankenstein tale from another perspective. So, it has been with me for a while. Maybe I just need to finish one of these and get it out of my system.